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I Gave My Cat A Bath The Other Day ...
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I gave my cat a bath the other day ... they love it. He sat there, he
enjoyed it, it was fun for me. The fur would stick to my tongue, but other
than that ...
-- Steve Martin
Related:
My boy is mean kid. I came home the other day and saw him taping worms to the sidewalk, he sits there and watches the birds get hernias.
Well, only last Christmas I gave him a B-B gun and he gave me a sweatshirt with a bulls-eye on the back....
My other cat is a Jaguar.
My other cat is a Leopard.
The other day my wife brought home a toy for our baby boy.
It was a small wooden mailbox with three openings in i...
I neutered my cat. Now he's a consultant.
If I knew what brand [of whiskey] he drinks, I would send a barrel or so to my other generals.
-- Abraham Lincoln, on General Gra...
I told my doctor I wanted to stop aging. He gave me a gun!
If this is anyone other than Steve Allen, you're stealing my bit!
-- Krusty the ex-Klown, "Krusty Gets Kancelled...
I bought a dog the other day... I named him Stay. It's fun to call him.
.. "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane....