Related:

• I got no prob with "Bob
• A bunch of Polish scientists decided to flee their repressive government by hijacking an airliner and forcing the pilot to fly them to the West.
  They drove to the airport, forced their way on board a large passenger jet, and found there was no pilot on board....
• This land is my land, and only my land, I've got a shotgun, and you ain't got one, If you don't get off, I'll blow your head off, This land is private property.
  -- Apologies to Woody Guthrie...
• Troy: [voiceover] When Krusty the clown got canceled, he tried everything to stay on the air.
  Here's what you didn't see. Krusty: Watch my show, I will send you this book featuring me in a variety of sexually explicit positions....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• I have a switch in my apartment... it doesn't do anything.
  ... Every once in a while, I turn it on and off.......
• Guru Saj: You must be Ross. Ross: Hi. Guru Saj: I am Guru Saj.
  (takes the drawer back and replaces) Ross: Listen, I got to tell you I_ve-I_ve never been to a guru before, so....
• I got fired from my job as an M&M proof reader, I kept eating the W&W.
• One promising concept that I came up with right away was that you could manufacture personal air bag
  hen get a law passed requiring that they be installed on congressmen to keep them from taking trips....