Related:

• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....
• I was a tiny baby when I was born. Really tiny. I was breast-fed intravenously.
  I had to have a special nurse 'cause I was so little....
• I thought that you said you were 20 years old!" "As a programmer, yes," she replied, "And you claimed to be very near two meters tall!
  "You said you were blonde, but you lied!" Oh, she was a hacker and he was one, too, They had so much in common, you'd say....
• COONDOG MEMORY (heard in Rutledge, Missouri, about eighteen years ago) Now
  his dog is for sale, and she can not only follow a trail twice as old as the average dog can, but she's got a pretty good memory to boot....
• Eddie: Did you hold a grudge against Montgomery Burns?
  Moe: No! [buzz] All right, maybe I did. But I didn't shoot him....
• QOTD: "I've got one last thing to say before I go; give me back all of my stuff.
• I did cancel one performance in Holland where they thought my music was so easy that they didn't rehearse at all.
  And so the first time when I found that out, I rehearsed the orchestra myself in front of the audience of 3,000 people and the next day I rehearsed through the second movement -- this was the piece _Cheap Imitation_ -- and they then were ashamed....
• My youngest child is the funniest one of the group.
  I had just finished eating and my stomach was swollen from the food that went in it....