Related:

• You slapped my face Oh but so gently I smiled At the caress. -- William Carlos William
• ...no whiteness is so white as the memory of whiteness. -- William Carlos William
• Two men were sitting over coffee, contemplating the nature of things, with all due respect for their breakfast.
  I wonder why it is that toast always falls on the buttered side," said one....
• Homer: Woo hoo! I'm so glad to have my mom back. I never realized how much I missed her!
  Marge: [pause] She's nice. Homer: But...? Marge: I just don't think you should get too excited about the woman who abandoned you for 25 years....
• Funny, I just knew you were going to say that.
• If I were you, who'd be me?
• Selma: Are you gay? Troy: Gay? I wish! If I were gay they'd be no problem!
  No, what I have is a romantic abnormality, one so unbelievable that it must be hidden from the public at all cost....
• So where were the spiders?