Related:

• I was almost shot and killed before the opening credits! -- Woody Allen, "What's Up, Tiger Lily?
• As you know, death is my bread and danger my butter.
  No, danger is my bread and death is my butter. No, danger is my, death is, no, no wait, sorry, death and danger are my various breads and various butters....
• Silence when you're shouting at me! -- Woody Allen, What's New, Pussycat?
• What is it about death that bothers me so? Probably the hours. -- Woody Alle
• What do you get when you cross a pitbull with a cattle prod? Bitten.
• Lascivious adulterer!" "Don't call me that again until I look it up!
  Ah, a lascivious adulterer is a man who is a lascivious adulterer!...
• After fifteen minutes, I wanted to marry her, and after thirty minutes I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
  -- Woody Allen, "Take the Money and Ru...
• Eighty percent of success is showing up. -- Woody Alle
• Showing up is 80 percent of life. -- Woody Alle