Related:

• Marge, it'll cost eighty-five hundred dollars! We only have five hundred in the bank, and that leaves.
  .. eighty-hundred we need. -- Carry the ten, "Marge Gets a Job...
• Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. There's an easy way to get rid of Chester without the guilt of sending him back to the gutter.
  And all it'll cost you is a thousand dollars....
• I owed my friend George $25. For about three weeks I owed it to him.
  The whole time I had the money on me---he didn't know it....
• No matter how much it costs to go to the State University
  it will cost just about five times that much to go to the State Penitentiary, so it is much cheaper to go to the State University and far more interesting and rewarding....
• My uncle got a job driving a cab. He had the cab parked right in front of Grand Central Station, and an Episcopal bishop got into my uncle's cab.
  He said, "Take me to Christ Church." So my uncle took him up to St....
• My Uncle Fred died of asbestosis - it took six months to cremate him.
• I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Cave Man the best.
  We called him Uncle Cave Man because he lived in a cave and because sometimes he'd eat one of us....
• I GUESS OF ALL MY UNCLES, I liked Uncle Caveman the best.
  We called him Uncle Caveman because he lived in a cave and because sometimes he'd eat one of us....
• My uncle was the town drunk -- and we lived in Chicago. -- George Gobel