Related:

• Hello, this is Rip van Winkle. I'm not awake to take your call right now.
  Please leave your message at the sound of the snore....
• A rancher is a farmer who farms the public lands with a herd of four-legged lawn mowers.
  -- Edward Abbey...
• In the midst of our sorrow, we can take solace in the fact that your elevated blood alcohol level probably helped you burn up quicker.
  -- Melvin van Horne at Krusty's funeral, "Bart the Fink...
• If one is master of one thing and understands one thing well, one has at the same time, insight into and understanding of many things.
  -- Van Gogh...
• ___ / \ | RIP | |_____|
• One thing to be said about Packard Automobiles, none of them were recalled!
• Ambition is in fact the avarice of power.
• Last night the power went out. Good thing my camera had a flash.
  ... The neighbors thought it was lightning in my house, so they called the cops....
• O Get one man to ride his bycicle =`\<, and there is hope for the human race (=)/(=) -- A.
  A.M. van Gulik...