Related:

• Dimensions will always be expressed in the least usable term, convertible only through the use of weird and unnatural conversion factors.
  Velocity, for example, will be expressed in furlongs per fortnight....
• Quality in a product or service is not what the supplier puts in.
  It is what the customer gets out and is willing to pay for....
• The customer isn't always right, but they do get an unnatural amount of slack
• Those aren't WINOS--that's my JUGGLER, my AERIALIST, my SWORD SWALLOWER, and my LATEX NOVELTY SUPPLIER!
  ! -- Zippy the Pinhead...
• How's it going in those MODULAR LOVE UNITS?? -- Zippy the Pinhead
• Acme n. The canonical supplier of bizarre, elaborate, and non-functional gadgetry - where Rube Goldberg and Heath Robinson (two cartoonists who specialized in elaborate contraptions) shop.
  The name has been humorously expanded as A (or American) Company Making Everything....
• A fool and his money is my kind of customer!
• NO customer can be worse than no customer.
• free software n. As defined by Richard M. Stallman and used by the Free Software movement, this means software that gives users enough freedom to be used by the free software community.
  Specifically, users must be free to modify the software for their private use, and free to redistribute it either with or without modifications, either commercially or noncommercially, either gratis or charging a distribution fee....