Related:

• Most people do not know how to behave in a massacre.
• Where do you want me to sign that contract? -- Famous Last Word
• Diamond Joe Quimby: Chief Wiggum, Archbishop McGee, distinguished guests, I am pleased to dedicate this emergency warning system.
  In the off-chance of a nuclear disaster, this sign will tell you, the good citizens of Springfield, what to do!...
• I've got a friend who is a boxer. Once he hung up his coat in a restaurant but he was afraid someone would run off with it.
  He hung a sign on it saying, "This coat belongs to the champion boxer of the world and I'll be back....
• Obedience. A religion of slaves. A religion of intellectual death.
  I like it. Don't ask questions, don't think, obey the Word of the Lord -- as it has been conveniently brought to you by a man in a Rolls with a heavy Rolex on his wrist....
• Quimby: {This is incredible. It's God's most wondrous miracle.
  } Nurse: {Sir, I think your wife wants to hold the baby....
• As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no sign had ever appeared before.
  I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident. -- Excerpt from insurance form....
• Burns: Just sign this form, and the money will be yours.
  Muhahahahaha.... Ahem. Sorry, I was just um, eh, um, thinking of something funny Smithers did today....
• Just don't give up trying to do what you really want to do.
  Where there is love and inspiration, I don't think you can go wrong. -- Ella Fitzgerald...