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• He] took me into his library and showed me his books, of which he had a complete set.
  -- Ring Lardne...
• A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light. -- Henry Morga
• Everybody has his own theater, in which he is manager, actor, prompter, playwrite, sceneshifter, boxkeeper, doorkeeper, all in one, and audience into the bargain.
  -- Julius C. Hare, Augustus W. Hare, Guesses at Truth...
• On his way back from work, a driver came upon a horrible wreck in which one car looked exactly like his neighbor's.
  Stopping hurriedly on the side of the road, he ran toward the smoldering debris....
• A Scotsman was strolling across High Street one day wearing his kilt.
  As he neared the far curb, he noticed two young blondes in a red convertible eyeing him and giggling....
• Fresh as a bridegroom; and his chin new reap'd Showed like a stubble-land at harvest-home
  He was perfumed like a milliner, And 'twixt his finger and his thumb he held A pouncet-box, which ever and anon He gave his nose and took 't away again....
• The honeymooning couple agreed it was a fine day for horseback riding.
  After a mile or so, the bride's mount cantered under a low tree and a branch scraped her forehead lightly....
• You have here an unusual opportunity to appraise the human mind, or to examine, in Earth terms, the roles of good and evil in a man.
  His negative side, which you call hostility, lust, violence...
• If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
  Henry David Thoreau...