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• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Homer: The last bar in Springfield...if they don't let me in here, I'm going to have to quit drinking!
  Homer's liver: Yay! Homer: Shut up, liver!...
• When you are young, you enjoy a sustained illusion that sooner or later something marvelous is going to happen, that you are going to transcend your parents' limitations.
  .. At the same time, you feel sure that in all the wilderness of possibility...
• There's a comedian over here in Britain called Jack Dee who came out with a great string of Famous Last Words.
  He came up with the idea of a Black Box Recorder for cars, so that you could find out the last thing that was said in the car before crashing!...
• You're a one, aren't you! When you should be whispering sweet conversational nothings like 'Gosh!
  Something twice the size of the Royal Barge has just hoved into view between the sheets', you don't say a word....
• After two or three weeks of this madness, you begin to feel As One with the man who said, "No news is good news.
  In twenty-eight papers, only the rarest kind of luck will turn up more than two or three articles of any interest....
• MAKE MONEY FAST FROM SLASHDOT!!!!!! You are probably familiar with the Slashdot.
  org "News for Nerds" site. You've probably heard about the "Slashdot Effect"....
• A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex
  for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose....
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....