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• My only books Were woman's looks,-- And folly 's all they 've taught me.
  -- Thomas Moore (1779-1852) -- The Time I 've lost in wooing...
• I owe all of my success in life to always having been a quarter of an hour beforehand.
  HORATIO NELSON...
• Grandma: Homer, you grew up so handsome. Homer: Some people say I look like Dan Aykroyd.
  I can't believe you're here! Dad always told me you died while I was at the movies....
• I have always been crazy, but it kept me from going insane.
• Company, villanous company, hath been the spoil of me.
  -- William Shakespeare (1564-1616), King Henry IV -- Act iii, Sc. 3...
• Please don't spoil everything by telling me the truth.
• I thought you were insufferable. Now you'll just suffer.
• I(ve) B(een) M(islead)
• Guru Saj: You must be Ross. Ross: Hi. Guru Saj: I am Guru Saj.
  (takes the drawer back and replaces) Ross: Listen, I got to tell you I_ve-I_ve never been to a guru before, so....