Related:

• I think we just lost the baby with the bath water.
• We invented a new protocol and called it Kermit, after Kermit the Frog, star of "The Muppet Show.
  [3] [3] Why? Mostly because there was a Muppets calendar on the wall when we were trying to think of a name, and Kermit is a pleasant, unassuming sort of character....
• Flanders: Reverend, I'm, uh, I'm afraid something terrible has happened.
  Lovejoy: Well, sit down and rap with me brother, that's what I'm here for....
• The other day my wife brought home a toy for our baby boy.
  It was a small wooden mailbox with three openings in i...
• I was a war baby. My parents took a look at me and started fighting.
• Potty Mouth! Potty Mouth!
• Larry: Sheesh, Dad and I, we started out great. But now it's falling apart like a Chinese motorcycle.
  Homer: It's so unfair. You're everything a dad could hope for....
• I don't know where we come from, Don't know where we're going to, And if all this should have a reason, We would be the last to know.
  So let's just hope there is a promised land, And until then, ....
• Quimby: {This is incredible. It's God's most wondrous miracle.
  } Nurse: {Sir, I think your wife wants to hold the baby....