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• I made quite a name for myself back home. I left when I found out what it was. -- Herb Shrine
• You will never know until you have found out, and when you do find out, you may well wish you had not known.
• The BBS you wrote home about...
• Remember Gummidge's Law and you will never be found out.
• Beethoven wrote nine symphonies. They never wrote back.
• Called a blind date to set up a meeting at a restaurant.
  I said, "I'll be the one driving the Mercedes and wearing a Rolex....
• I eventually found out what my ranch-foreman husband really meant," sobbed the fairly recent bride, "when we told me that he'd love me till the cows came home".
• Just yesterday morning, they let me know you were gone, Suzanne, the plans they made put an end to you, I went out this morning and I wrote down this song, Just can't remember who to send it to.
  .. Oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain, I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end, I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend, But I always thought that I'd see you again....
• Nobert Weiner was the subject of many dotty professor stories.
  Weiner was, in fact, very absent minded. The following story is told about him...