Related:

• You have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep.
  -- Answering machine madness - brevity...
• To the tune of "Ride of the Valkyries":) Leave a message.
  .. Leave a message... -- Answering machine madness - mainly musical theme...
• To scare off annoying liberals:) Hello, and thank you for calling the Bush in 50 Campaign.
  Your five dollar donation to get George Bush re-elected in all 50 states will automatically be charged to your phone bill....
• Fairly boring message:) This is John. I can't come to the phone right now, but if you leave a message at the tone, I'll return your call.
  (Now, re-record the message every morning. Frequent callers will notice that something sounds different, but will be confused since the words are exactly the same....
• You have reached the Des Moines chapter of the Iowa Procrastination Society.
  Please leave a message after the tone and we'll get around to it....
• Computer generated voices:) 1: Hello, there are no real people here to answer the phone right now.
  2: Yeah, nobody but us machines! 1: Right, just us machines, but don't hang up!...
• Being reincarnated as an answering machine is the pits.
  Keep your karma clean by leaving your name, number, message, and the time that you called....
• Sultry female voice:) Welcome to Susan's Message Parlor of Delights.
  We would be delighted if you would leave your name, number, and of course a message that doesn't rub us the wrong way....
• Answering machine message "Thank you for calling the [insert city name here] Opera Auditioning Hotline!
  At the tone, sing one of your favorite pieces, and leave a short message containing your name and phone number....