Related:

• In the reign of Charles II. a certain worthy divine at Whitehall thus addressed himself to the auditory at the conclusion of his sermo
  "In short, if you don't live up to the precepts of the Gospel, but abandon yourselves to your irregular appetites, you must expect to receive your reward in a certain place which 't is not good manners to mention here....
• Poor Tom is cold. Pity poor Tom, for his nose is frozen, and he doth shiver, and.
  ..is maaaddddd!!!!! Oh, shut up. -- Tom the Beggar and Edmund : Money...
• Wealth is not his that has it, but his that enjoys it. -- Poor Richard
• Life is like a box of chocolates... you never know what you're gonna get.
  -- Tom Hanks, Forrest Gump...
• Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie.
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Poor man... he was like an employee to me.
  -- The police commissioner on Sledge Hammer laments the death of his bodyguard...
• SATAN, n. One of the Creator's lamentable mistakes, repented in sashcloth and axes.
  Being instated as an archangel, Satan made himself multifariously objectionable and was finally expelled from Heaven....
• One man has never married, and that's his hell; another is, and that's his plague.
  Robert Burton (1577-1640)...