Related:

• As some day it may happen that a victim must be found I've got a little list -- I've got a little list Of society offenders who might well be underground And who never would be missed -- who never would be missed.
  -- Koko, "The Mikado...
• Guru Saj: You must be Ross. Ross: Hi. Guru Saj: I am Guru Saj.
  (takes the drawer back and replaces) Ross: Listen, I got to tell you I_ve-I_ve never been to a guru before, so....
• I remember Massingbird's most famous case - the Case of the Bloody Knife.
  A man was found next to the murdered body. He had the knife in his hand, thirteen witnesses had seen him stab the victim, and when the police arrived, he said, "I'm glad I killed the bastard"....
• Into each life some rain must fall, Some days must be dark and dreary.
  -- Henry W. Longfellow (1807-1882) -- The Rainy Day...
• When you're lying awake with a dismal headache, and repose is taboo'd by anxiety, I conceive you may use any language you choose to indulge in, without impropriety -- W.
  S. Gilbe...
• If the conjecture `You would rather I had not disturbed you by sending you this.
  ' is correct, you may add it to the list of uncomfortable truths. -- Edsger W. Dijkstra...
• I 've wandered east, I 've wandered west, Through many a weary way
  But never, never can forget The love of life's young day....
• You've no idea of what a poor opinion I have of myself, and how little I deserve it.
  -- W.S. Gilbe...
• I went to the eye doctor and found out I needed glasses for reading.
  So, I got some flip-up contact lenses. -- Stephen Wrigh...