When I Was Eight, I Played Little League. I Was On Fi

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When I was eight, I played Little League. I was on first; I stole third; I
went straight across. Earlier that week, I learned that the shortest distance
between two points was a direct line. I took advantage of that knowledge.
-- Steven Wright

I took a baby shower. -- Steven Wrigh
I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone. -- Steven Wrigh
I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart. -- Steven Wrigh
The shortest distance between two puns ... is a straight line.
Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle. -- Steven Wrigh
I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn't have to go so fast.
-- Steven Wrigh...
I went to a garage sale. How much for the garage? It's not for sale. -- Steven Wrigh
I used to live in a house by the freeway. When I went anywhere, I had to be going 65 MPH by the end of my driveway.
-- Steven Wrigh...
I was skydiving horizontally. -- Steven Wrigh

When I Was Eight, I Played Little League. I Was On Fi

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