Related:

• Don't do drugs because if you do drugs you'll go to prison, and drugs are really expensive in prison.
  -- John Hardwick...
• Violent, televised hockey is the chief cause of prison riots in this country.
  Think about it: You're a convict sitting in your cell at the federal penitentiary watching a hockey player on TV get a two-minute penalty....
• One good reason why computers can do more work than people is that they never have to stop and answer the phone.