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• Christmas time is here, by Golly; Kill the turkeys, ducks and chicke
  Disapproval would be folly; Mix the punch, drag out the Dicke...
• Oh, why did I have to start my diet on pork chop night?
  -- Homer, setting out on his diet, "Brush with Greatne...
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• FORTUNE DISCUSSES THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN
  #16 Relationships: First of all, a man does not call a relationship a relationship -- he refers to it as "that time when me and Suzie were doing it on a semi-regular basis"....
• Bart: [plays with Sergeant Thug's Mountaintop Command Post, making plane and machine gun noises] Abe
  Hey, watch it with that thing! [a missile launches out the window] My skull is eggshell-thin....
• Bart: [in pain] Why? Jessica: I'm sorry, Bart. You know my parents can't find out about us.
  And besides, if it's secret, it's even more exciting....
• Lisa: Nelson! Um... that note Milhouse gave you? It wasn't from him.
  It was from... me. Nelson: You?! Why would _you_ like me?...
• Marge: Tomorrow night, it might be nice to go out for dinner.
  Homer: Tomorrow night? Friday? Pork chop night? Marge!...