Related:

• The best things in life are free. And the cheesiest things in life are free with a paid subscription to Sports Illustrated.
  -- Johnny Carso...
• Johnny Carson: I just heard Milli Vanilli was arrested for impersonating a McNugget.
  Ed McMahon: Ho ho ho ho! Bart: Well, it's still fun to be up late....
• I'm not so sure that I will miss Johnny Carson, but Johnny Carson will miss me.
• Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.
  -- Johnny Carso...
• Funnier than Johnny Carson, but then again, who isn't?
• When turkeys mate, they think of swans. -- Johnny Carso
• Nancy Reagan fell down and broke her hair. -- Johnny Carso
• Johnny Carson: [as Karnak] Geraldo Rivera, Madonna, and a diseased yak.
  Ed McMahon: Ho ho ho ho....
• Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom.