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• Oh give me your pity! I'm on a committee, We attend and amend Which means that from morning And contend and defend to night, Without a conclusion in sight.
  We confer and concur, We defer and demur, We revise the agenda And reiterate all of our thoughts....
• The gladsome light of jurisprudence. -- Sir Edward Coke (1549-1634) -- First Institute
• How many bankers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  None, bankers don't change light bulbs. Note: Ever notice that the electronic bank signs are full of burned-out light bulbs?...
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....
• How many Kennedys -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, at least until we get some corroborating witnesses....
• Salesman: Over here we have the Hick Tub, the, er, Insta-Rust, that's the Lightning Magnet, that's the Tinkler -- Home
  Ooh, the Tinkler! I like the sound of that. We'll take it!...
• How many smokers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  At least five. If they all light up together the light bulb will do so too....
• To be, or not to be: that is the question: whether 't is nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing end them?
  To die: to sleep: No more; and by a sleep to say we end the heartache and the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to,--'t is a consummation devoutly to be wish'd....
• All the secrets we may be able to keep from any and every god and human being do not in the least absolve us from the obligation to refrain from whatever actions are greedy
  unjust, sensual, or otherwise immoderate. -- Cicero, On Dutie...