Related:

• Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners.
  In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots....
• Oh, my God. Space aliens. Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids!
  Eat them! -- Homer faces alien abduction, "Treehouse of Horror VII...
• Figures figure and women lie.
• Figures lie and women figure.....
• MANNA, n. A food miraculously given to the Israelites in the wilderness.
  When it was no longer supplied to them they settled down and tilled the soil, fertilizing it, as a rule, with the bodies of the original occupants....
• ABORIGINIES, n. Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country.
  They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ALIEN INVASION IMMINENT It now known that an alien species has been watching this planet for several years now.
  They have sent their scouts ahead, who have infiltrated much of the civilised world....
• WAR, n. A by-product of the arts of peace. The most menacing political condition is a period of international amity.
  The student of history who has not been taught to expect the unexpected may justly boast himself inaccessible to the light....
• An Australian lover is like a wombat :- he eats roots, shoots, and leaves.