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• Get down and Modem the night away!
• BREAKFAST The first of three major meals of the day
  breakfast for the average person will normally consist of a small to average amount of food, such as a medium serving of artichoke, followed by three slices of cow pie and orange juice, two boxes of Corn Flakes, ninety-seven unpeeled bananas, fifteen rashers of bacon, nineteen eggs, toast, and a sesame-seed bun....
• A new study collected data that shows that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than are people who do not snore.
  It is well known that many people who snore also stop breathing frequently during the night for a few seconds, a condition called sleep apnea....
• Live! Via modem... It's Saturday Night Taglines.
• The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
• By Day, Enlighten; By Night, Endarken.
• The beauty of America is that the average person always thinks she is above average.
  -- Sam Levenson The problem with America is that the average person always thinks she is above average....
• It's not easy for a night person to work days.
• Studies show that the average person has one testicle and one breast.