Related:

• As the tone echoes through the air, the sorcerer appears in a cloud of purple smoke.
  He says, "Congratulations! You've obtained a perfect score!...
• Looking for a cool one after a long, dusty ride, the drifter strode into the saloon.
  As he made his way through the crowd to the bar, a man galloped through town screaming, "Big Mike's comin'!...
• Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent.
  Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands....
• Everybody but Sam had signed up for a new company pension plan that called for a small employee contribution.
  The company was paying all the rest. Unfortunately, 100% employee participation was needed...
• In his house he had a large looking-glass, before which he would stand and go through his exercises.
  -- Plutarch (46-120 AD) -- Life of Demosthene...
• New Linux Companies Hope To Get Rich Quick (#2) Don't throw out that old Red Hat Linux 3.
  0 CD. A group of entrepreneurs are hording vintage Linux items in the hopes that they will become hot collector's items in the coming decades....
• Dan Quayle, in April 1991, was concerned that his advisors may be getting out of touch with 'Real Americans.
  ' In order to combat this, he suggested that they read People magazine....
• Bart: Hey, guys! Sign my cast? [holds out a pen] Sign my cast?
  [they all walk past] Guys! [they jump in the pool, laughing and playing] Milhouse!...
• After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven.
  As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created....