Related:

• Second Law of Office Murphology: Office machines that function perfectly during normal business hours will break down when you return at night to use them for personal business.
• Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by spontaneously moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.
  -- Fifth Law of Office Murphology...
• When you stick your fingers in the mains, its not the imaginary component which you will feel.
  -- From an EIST lecture...
• First you go out and buy a stick--it's called a baton--about this long.
  Then you get some music, you get musicians together, you give them this music, you stand in front of them with the stick in your right hand, you go like this, and a mysterious thing happe...
• You never have to worry about contradictions when you stick to the facts.
• You can't be happy if you do things different when you do them than when you discuss them.
• If you want to get rich from writing, write the sort of thing that's read by persons who move their lips when the're reading to themselves.
  -- Don Marqui...
• The cops are ALWAYS around when you DON'T want them.
• The best things come when you aren't expecting them.