Related:

• If I want to hear you scream in pain I'll play some rap music.
• Seems like this guy wanders into a rural outfitting store in Alaska, and starts talking to a rather grizzled old man sitting by the cash register.
  "Hear ya got a lotta' bears 'round here?" "Yeah, you could say that," answers the old man....
• It's a Wonderful Life Every time you hear a bell ring, it means that some angel just got his wings.
  --Henry Trave...
• Every time you try to operate one of these weird black controls that are labeled in black on a black background, a little black light lights up black to let you know you've done it.
  -- The Restaurant at the End of the Universe...
• Did you hear about the jealous black activist who suspected that his wife was involved in some honkie-panky.
• Experience keeps a dear school, but fools will learn in no other, and scarcely in tha
  for it is true, we may give advice, but we cannot give conduct....
• Jimbo: Man, that guy's guitar is talking. Otto
  Hey, my shoes are talking too! Left Shoe: Don't worry....
• Did you hear that bookstores will soon be stocking a volume called "The Unsensuous Census Taker".
  It's about a guy who comes once every ten years....
• It stinks more every time you run over a skunk.