Related:

• Go on, get out - last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
  (To his housekeeper, who urged him to tell her his last words so she could write them down for posterity....
• The last time I saw him he was walking down Lover's Lane holding his own hand. -- Fred Alle
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• A five-year-old kid raised his hand at school. The teacher declined to let him leave the room.
  Five minutes later she reversed herself. She said, "All right, Sonny, you may go now....
• His hand will be against every man, and every man's hand against him.
  -- Old Testament -- Genesis xvi, 12...
• Much to his Mum and Dad's dismay, Horace ate himself one day.
  He didn't stop to say his grace, he just sat down and ate his face....
• Smithers: [over intercom] Principal Skinner, this is your secretary.
  There is one last student here to see you....
• Captain, phasers and photons down, get the hand phaser ou
• Once there was a little nerd who loved to read your mail
  And then yank back the i-access times to get hackers off his tail, And once as he finished reading from the secretary's spool, He wrote a rude rejection to her boyfriend (how uncool!...