Related:

• Shutton: Uh, Dave Shutton, Springfield Daily Shopper.
  Who are you? Where are you going? Ke...
• Burns: The one who shot me was...[camera pans to Smithers] Aah!
  Aah! Waylon Smithers! Smithers: [pained] Noo! Wait a minute...
• Troy: [voiceover] When Krusty the clown got canceled, he tried everything to stay on the air.
  Here's what you didn't see. Krusty: Watch my show, I will send you this book featuring me in a variety of sexually explicit positions....
• Bart: I'm telling you, I _do_ work on the Krusty show.
  Look at the credits! [presses "play"] Krusty...
• BG: I cut my first and only album, "Sax on the Beach", but then I spent all my money on my $
  1,500 a day habit. [flashback] I'd like another Fabrege egg, please?...
• Monty: [dropping a ring into a champagne glass] Now
  my dear, if you look in your champagne, I think you'll find a little surprise -- [Jackie drinks it, swallows the ring, and chokes a little] Heh, uh, not to worry, I believe there's another one around here somewhere -- [reaches into boiling fondue, burns himself] [kneeling] My darling, since my kneecaps are filling with fluid as we speak....
• Kent: On the line with us now is plant owner C. Montgomery Burns.
  Mr. Burns? Burns: Oh, hello, Kent. [as loud rhythmic buzzing continues in the background] Right now, skilled nuclear energy technicians are calmly correcting a minor, piffling malfunction....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• phone rings] Kent: Well it looks like we have our first caller.
  ..and I mean ever, because this is not a call-in show....