Homer: Honey, I'm home!
Marge: Hello, dear. How was work at the plant?
Homer: It's not a plant, Marge, it's a tree, and I've nearly chewed
through it. Now remember, my new boss is coming home for
dinner tonight.
Marge: I know, and I made your favorite -- stakes!
[gestures toward a big plate of fence stakes. The audience
(the one on TV, but probably the one at home, too) groans]
Bart: Hey, could you two close the dam door?
Marge: Bart!
Bart: But that's where we live. A _dam_.
Marge: [grumbles]
"Lisa": [walks in] Look everybody, Maggie got her first tooth.
[holds up Maggie, in a baby-beaver costume, complete with
buck tooth. The audience laughs, then goes, "awwww"]
Homer: Now, before my boss comes, there's something important you
should know.
[doorbell rings]
Marge: In a minute, Homey, I have to get the door. [goes to greet
the visitor]
Homer: But, Marge!
[not heeding, Marge opens the door. Tim Conway stands at the
entrance, dressed as a skunk. The family faints]
Conway: Oh, was it something I said?
-- "The Simpsons Spinoff Showcase"
