Related:

• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Lisa: Dad, why is the world such a cesspool of corruption?
  Homer: [sotto voce] Oh, great... [speaking up] All right, what makes you say that?...
• Lisa: Look, we got a package from the Mr. Sparkle company in Japan.
  Homer: Ooh! [opens package, but only Styrofoam packing peanuts spill out....
• Miss Allbright: Today's topic will be Hell. Kids: Ooh.
  Bart: All right. I sat through Mercy and I sat through Forgiveness....
• Smithers: [chuckles] Perfect. When I give the signal, you transfer the call to Mr.
  Burns. After she tears into him I'll rush in and save the day....
• Apu: Oh, hello, Mrs. Homer. I brought an assortment of jerkys.
  Homer: Oh, did you swipe those from work? Apu: Certainly not....
• Homer: Phew! I'm back. [walks up stairs to kitchen where family eats breakfast] Aw, my loving family!
  Nothing's changed. [a buzzer goes off; a TV screen morphs from the floor] Ned...
• Lisa: Dad? Homer: Yes, honey? Lisa: Um...Mom just baked a cake.
  Homer: Ooh! [walks into kitchen] Huh? Marge: Homer, we need to have a serious talk....
• TV: Hear Me Roar, the Network for Women. In the next half-hour, we'll show you how to cut your first-aid bill in half by making your own band-aids.
  Marge: Ooh, that's a good idea. TV: Now before we begin, you need five yards of sterilized cotton....