Scientist: People, we're in danger of losing our funding. America isn't
interested in space exploration any more.
Assistant: Maybe we should finally tell them the big secret: that all
the chimps we sent into space came back super-intelligent.
Chimp: No, I don't think we'll be telling them _that_.
[Roller skates away, making monkey noises]
-- The best-kept secret, "Deep Space Homer"