Related:

• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Lisa: [gasps] Ashley Grant! You gave a talk on women's issues at my school on how we don't have to be second-class citizens.
  Bart: [indignant] Mom! How can you leave us with this maniac?...
• Bart: Come watch TV with me, Dad. We missed the first two episodes of "Cops", but if we hurry we can catch the last three.
  Homer: Aw, sorry Bart, Lisa and I are going out for a gelato....
• Marge: It's almost lunch time. Do you know where your brother is tutoring?
  Lisa: Pfft. Tutoring? The only thing Bart's teaching is guerilla combat in Shelbyville....
• Homer: Fine. I can have a great time all by myself.
  Lisa: Hey Dad, I think state and federal laws require us to have a babysitter....
• Lisa: [spraying the Christmas tree] Mom, this fake snow is making me dizzy.
  Marge: We're almost finished. There's just a little bit of green left....
• Bart: Can I come to the candy show, huh, huh? Can I, can I?
  Huh, huh, huh? Can I? Can I? Lisa: No, me!...
• Homer and Bart laugh] Marge: [covering her eyes] I can't even watch.
  I don't know how you two can sit her laughing at poor Lisa while she's out there probably scared to death....
• Marge: [making lunch] Extra mustard for Bart, sliced diagonally, not lengthwise.
  Light mayo for Lisa, cut off the crust. Double baloney for Homer....