Arachnoleptic fit (n.) The frantic dance performed just after
you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

Beelzebug (n.) Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into
your bedroom at 3 in the morning and cannot be cast out.

Bozone (n.) The substance surrounding stupid people that stops
bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately,
shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

Cashtration (n.) The act of buying a house, which renders the
subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

Caterpallor (n.) The color you turn after finding half a grub in
the fruit you're eating.

Decaflon (n.) The grueling event of getting through the day
consuming only things that are good for you.

Dopelar effect (n.) The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter
when you come at them rapidly.

Extraterrestaurant (n.) An eating place where you feel you've
been abducted and experimented upon. Also known as an E-T-ry.

Faunacated (adj.) How wildlife ends up when its environment is
destroyed. Hence faunacatering (v.), which has made a meal of=20
many species.

Grantartica (n.) The cold, isolated place where art companies
dwell without funding.

Hemaglobe (n.) The bloody state of the world.

Intaxication (n.) Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts
until you realize it was your money to start with.

Kinstirpation (n.) A painful inability to move relatives who
come to visit.

Lullabuoy (n.) An idea that keeps floating into your head and
prevents you from drifting off to sleep.










Seth Croston Barber <kn1ght@cyberis.net>
Last modified: Wed Oct 06 13:29:36 PDT 1999