. . . your twin sister forgets your birthday.
. . . you wake up face down on the pavement.
. . . you put your bra on backwards and it fits better.
. . . you call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.
. . . you see a "60 Minutes news team" waiting in your outer office.
. . . your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
. . . your only son tells you he wishes Anita Bryant would mind her
own business.
. . . you want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party,
and there aren't any.
. . . you turn on the TV news and they're displaying emergency
routes out of your city.
. . . the woman you've been seeing on the side begins to look like
your wife.
. . . you wake up to discover that your water bed broke and then
you realize that you don't have a water bed.
. . . your horn goes off accidently and remains stuck as you
follow a group of Hell's Angels on the freeway.