Q> How many blondes does it take to play tag?
A> One. (think about it)
"Practice safe government -- use a kingdom."
An American, a German, and a Polishman are on a safari deep in the woods
of Africa. The tour guide, a native African, stopped suddenly, and looked at
the gentlemen. He said, "I will not go further in this jungle. Just ahead
are rare cannibals. I will not risk my life." The three gentlemen look at
each other, and decide to check it out. The tour guide split, and the guys
started walking. It wasn't long before they were captured by the cannibals.
The cannibals tied them up and hung them upside down from a tree. The chief
came up to them and said, "We are cannibals. We will eat your insides, use
your bones for tools, and use your skin to cover our canoes.". The chief turned
to the American and said, "Do you have a last request?". The American replied,
"Bring me a knife.". The chief brings him a knife and hands it to the
American. The American opens the knife and says, "I will die with pride!", and
slits his throat. The chief asked the same thing to the German. The German
said, "Bring me a knife also.". The chief brings hime the knife, and the
German said, "I won't let YO kill me!", and he stabs himself in the heart. The
chief turned to the Polishman, and said, "What is your request?". The
Polishman says, "Bring me a fork.". The chief was puzzled, but he brought him
a fork. The Polishman started stabbing himself all over his body, screaming,
"You're not going to make a canoe out of me!!
There once was a man from Hitachi
Whose ass was becoming all blotchy
With his face full of dread
He finally said
It must've been the night with Liberace.
Is is true that Magic Johnson claims that his HIV infection
has nothing to do with his ability to come from behind?
NEWS FLASH -
The Centers for Disease Control have discovered a new process
by which AIDS can be transmitted: Magic.
