Related:

• These two ladies were walking down the street when they came across this frog.
  The frog said, "Kiss me and I will turn into a handsome Texas oil man....
• 3 Wishes An old lady is rocking away the last of her days on her front porch
  reflecting on her long life, when--all of a sudden--a fairy godmother appears in front of her and informs her that she will be granted three wishes....
• A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
  "Hurry!" she said, "Stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder....
• HYMNS? The Sunday before Christmas, a pastor told his congregation that the church needed some extra money.
  He asked the people to consider donating a little more than usual into the offering plate....
• The following are actual stories told by travel agents (and you wonder why US citizens generally score less than the rest of the world on geography).
  .. I had someone who wanted to stay at the Bob Newhart Inn in Connecticut....
• Various Nights Before Christmas... A Microsoft Christmas 'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, except Papa's mouse.
  The computer was humming, the icons were hopping, As Papa did last minute Internet shopping....
• Murphy's Laws On Love and Sex The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings.
  Nothing improves with age. No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take it, because it'll never be quite the same again....
• Sign from above... A lady about seven months pregnant got on a bus.
  She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her....
• 90 There was a young lady of Rhyll In an omnibus was taken ill, So she called the conductor, Who got in and fucked her, Which did more good than a pill.