Term Definition.
----- ---------------
Modem ................. What landscapers do to dem lawns.
Token Ring ............ A virtual engagement gift.
Ethernet .............. A device for catching the Ether Bunny.
DataPac ............... A size 14 girl in a size 8 bikini.
Asynch ................ A place to wash your hands.
Bysnch ................ The place where Elton John washes his hands.
BBS ................... Tall tales told by insects that produce honey.
ASCII ................. The ancient god of telecommunications. Rumored to
give vast amounts of data to believers. Hence,
the phrase "ASCII and you shall receive."
Block Parity .......... One heck of a good time.
Carrier Detect ........ Raison d'etre for premarital blood tests.
File Transfer ......... Procedure followed by INFORMATION CENTER staff who
are tired of their present jobs.
Hayes Compatible ...... Prone to riding with a grizzled old cowhand who
sings off-key. Gene Autry is the industry standard.
Serial Interface ...... A spoon.
Terminal Emulation .... A function performed by a canary that lays on its
back with its legs in the air.
X-Modem ............... A device on the losing end of an encounter with
lightning.
