Related:

• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....
• Another unanswered question is whether anyone has ever come back to win the presidency after, at his nominating convention, New Jersey put him over the top.
• Mr. Reagan says he's engaged in "quiet diplomacy" with the Soviets, and we gather that means more than that he's simply turned the volume down on his hearing aid.
  A new poll shows most Democrats want a Mondale-Hart ticket....
• Mr. Reagan got lots of applause at the convention for the economic recovery.
  His economists, meanwhile, will continue trying to figure out what he did right....
• A blind man is standing on the corner waiting for the street light to change so he can cross the street.
  He is holding his familiar red and white cane and in the other arm is a bag of groceries that he has just purchased....
• A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car.
  He later received in the mail a ticket for $40, and a photo of his car....
• There was two businessmen, whose names happened to be Mr Turtle and Mr Carro
  and one day as they were coming back from lunch Mr Turtle says to Mr Carrot, "You know, you're getting fat", to which Mr Carrot says "You're not so slim yourself!...
• A Frenchman, an Englishman, a Texan, and a Mexican are flying in a plane.
  The pilot explains to her passengers that the plane is too heavy and in order to avoid an ugly crash, some weight needs to be removed from the plane....