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• I AM NOT CONCEITED! I JUST HATE MORTALS.
• I'm not conceited; I just can't stand mortal
• They're making a new movie about Dan Quayle's military career.
  It's going to be called "FULL DINNER JACKET" Did you hear about the Polock who studied five days for a urine test?...
• Here in Kentucky, we're in the middle of deer hunting season, which means that the woods are full of people armed with weapons with a higher caliber than their IQ.
  Which brings to mind the story of the man who took his wife deer hunting (apologies to those who may be offended by the sexism - actually female deer hunters are no stupider than males)....
• 73 There was a young man of Natal Who was fucking a Hottentot gal.
  Said she, "You're a sluggard!" Said he, "You be buggered!...
• My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby.
  Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments....
• M.A.D.D is the acronym for Mathematicians Against Drunk Deriving .
  ... A Native American woman is sitting on a moose hide....
• I have tried relaxing but somehow I just feel better all up-tight.
• FUCK YOU" ---------- Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language is the word "FUCK".
  It is the one magical word, which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate....