Related:

• The future lies ahead. The past lies, lies, lie
• There are lies, damn lies, and environmentalists.
• A man happened upon a tombstone that read: "Here lies John Smith, A good man and a Lawyer.
  The man read it and asked: When did they start putting two people in one grave?...
• The 3 kinds of lies - lies, damned lies & statistics - MT
• A man was walking in a cemetary and he came upon a grave which had a headstone that said "here lies John Smith, Attorney at Law, a good man".
  The man thought for a moment and said to himself, "I didn't know that they began the practice of burying two men in the same grave in this cemetary....
• Everybody lies about sex
• The cruelest lies are told in silence.
• A man went to Africa to collect gorillas for a zoo.
  He had heard of a native who was an expert gorilla hunter, but had been warned that he should bargain carefully, because the natives had a tendency to include something for most of their relatives in the price....