Related:

• Bore. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
• This lady was a big fan of Elvis. And to show this, she decided to go and get a tattoo on her upper theigh.
  She went to the tattoo parlor and had it done. When the guy finished she look at it and said "That is not Elvis, it looks more like Roy Orbison!...
• Wife tells husband that if he doesn't smarten up she'll cut him off.
  He asked, "How you gonna do that? You don't even know where I'm getting it!...
• There was once this Aggie who was doing research on various plant life.
  So he goes out to a ranch and asks the old rancher if he could get some milkweed from out of the pasture....
• The little moron was strolling downtown one day when he spotted a man walking in the opposite direction who was being followed by twenty penguins.
  The man had a worried look on his face, which is perfectly normal because everyone knows how dangerous a bunch of penguins can be if cornered....
• While giving a physical, the doctor noticed that his patient's shins were covered with dark, savage bruises.
  "Tell me," said the doctor, "Do you play hockey or soccer?...
• When a man was reading the newspaper, his wife asked, "Will you still love me when I'm old and gray?
  Sure I do," he mumbled....
• A Blind Mans Sport A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting.
  When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him...
• One bright and early afternoon a ventriloquist was walking through a field when he encountered an indian grazing his cow, horse and sheep.
  The man smiled at the indian and asked, "How are you doing today Mr....