Related:

• Ever since I was a young boy, Megabogue I've sprayed phones in the mall.
  Brick Wall Painter" From Footscray to Beaumaris Pommy I must have sprayed them all....
• Shelve all your books with the spines facing the wall.
  Complain loudly that you can never find the book that you want....
• Not just me not just you all around the world
• houses --- In my house there's this light switch that doesn't do anything.
  Every so often I would flick it on and off just to check....
• All right! Another Earthquake.
• A man dies and goes to Heaven. The angel Gabriel meets him at the Pearly Gates and takes him on a guided tour.
  The man sees various groups of people all standing around and talking to each other....
• Things to do When Bored -Wax the ceiling -Rearrange political campaign signs -Sharpen your teeth -Play Houdini with one of your siblings -Braid your dog's hair -Clean and polish your belly button -Water your dog.
  ..see if he grows -Wash a tree -Knight yourself -Name your child Edsel -Scare Stephen King -Give your cat a mohawk -Purr -Mow your carpet -Play Pat Boone records backwards -Vacuum your lawn -Whine -Rake your carpet -Re-elect Richard Nixon -Critique "Three's Company" -Listen to a painting -Play with matches -Buff your cat -Race ferrets -Paint your house....
• Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all.
  .. Where do you take your dog if it loses its tail....