Related:

• I was walking down the street and all of a sudden the prescription for my eye-glasses ran out.
  -- Steven Wrigh...
• I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them.
  Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. -- Stephen Wrigh...
• The other day, I was walking my dog around my building.
  .. on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights....
• I was walking down the street the other day when I saw this guy with two wooden legs, but real feet.
• When I was a child... We had a quick-sand box in the backyard.
  .. I was an only child... eventually. -- Stephen Wrigh...
• I recently moved into a new apartment, and there was this switch on the wall that didn't do anything.
  .. so anytime I had nothing to do, I'd just flick that switch up and down....
• I went to the eye doctor and found out I needed glasses for reading.
  So, I got some flip-up contact lenses. -- Stephen Wrigh...
• When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me.
  I said, "Well, what do you need?" -- Stephen Wrigh...
• I bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. -- Stephen Wrigh