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• Now go on, boy, and pay attention. Because if you do, someday, you may achieve something that we Simpsons have dreamed about for generatio
  You may outsmart someone!...
• Homer: You didn't expect that, did you. And neither will he.
  Bart: You mean that I should fight dirty, Dad? Home...
• Homer: Oh, I need money. Apu: Well, if you need money, you should have at least jammed a gun in my ribs, or better yet, you could inquire about my help-wanted sign.
  Homer: You're looking for help? Apu: Yes, we need someone for the demanding yet high-profile midnight to 8am shift....
• Marge: It's a big day for you. Why don't you eat something a little more nutritious.
  Homer: Nonsense, Marge. Frosty Krusty Flakes is what got him where he is today!...
• Teacher: "Bart, give us an example of a modern-day paradox.
  Bart: "Damned if you do, damned if you don't." -- Bart the Genius "The Simpso...
• It could be one of these chemicals here that makes him so smart.
  Lisa, maybe you should try some of this. -- Homer Simpson Bart the Geniu...
• Marge: I can't believe our government would set up Bart like that!
  I'm must say, I'm very angry at the State Department right now....
• May you be fruitful and multiply so that your generations are as plentiful as the stars in the sky, and may you have to house, feed, and clothe them all.
• Bart: Mr. Burns, I don't want to seem ungrateful, but I want to go home to my family.
  Burns: [sighs] I was hoping I wouldn't have to tell you this, but....