Related:

• Smithers: Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your new co-worker, Mindy Simmons.
  I think she has a degree in Engineering or something....
• A man sank into the psychiatrist's couch and said, "I have a terrible problem, Doctor.
  I have a son at Harvard and another son at Princeto...
• Am I lightheaded because I'm not dead or because I'm still alive? -- Heidi Sandige
• LRA: Load RetroActively
• BELA LUGOSI is my co-pilot.. -- Zippy the Pinhead
• I looked up my wife's family tree. Most of her relatives are still climbing around in it.
• I have often looked at women and committed adultery in my heart. -- Jimmy Carte
• I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today.
  Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. -- Steven Wrigh...
• When I was in school, I cheated on my metaphysics exam
  I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me. -- Woody Alle...