Related:

• One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small, and the ones that mother gives you don't do anything at all.
  Go ask Alice when she's ten feet tall. -- Jefferson Airplane...
• You are ugly and your mother dresses you funny.
• A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
• Now Sally, don't you know you are not supposed to eat with your knife?
  "Yes, Mother, but my fork leaks....
• One pill makes you larger And if you go chasing rabbits And, one pill makes you small.
  And you know you're going to fall. And the ones that mother gives you, Tell 'em a hookah smoking caterpillar Don't do anything at all....
• You may be redneck... if your mother uses a spittoon.
• You're ugly and your mother dresses you funny.
• I'm the person your mother warned you about.
• May you outlive everyone but your mother-in-law.