Related:

• I think I strained a muscle I didn't know I had!
• I told the police that I was not injured, but upon removing my hat, I found that I had a fractured skull.
  -- Excerpt from insurance form....
• I had injured my hamstring playing football and was having difficulty sitting, he said to me "What's the matter - have hormones?
• I would rather dance as a ballerina, though faultily, than as a flawless clown.
  -- Margaret Atwood in Lady Oracle...
• I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight. -- Rita Rudne
• IBM: I Broke Mine
• IBM: I Built Mine
• Another time we were driving up the highway and saw a bindery named Muscle Bound.
  I said to my parents "Jeff thinks he's muscle-bound" to which he replied "Muscle-bound?...
• Worker: Quit complaining, chrome-dome. Homer: D'oh!
  If I had hair, you wouldn't be calling me that! -- "Simpson and Delilah...