Related:

• I beat Gaggle-max!
• If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am only for myself, what am I?
  If not now, when? -- Rabbi Hillel...
• For tomorrow I diet . . .
• When I was a Brownie, I ate all the cookies. -- Madonna
• Marge, I ate those fancy soaps you bought for the bathroom. -- Homer Simpson The Fro
• Oh God, here I go." --Max Baer, boxer, 1909-1959
• If I am not for myself, who is for me? And if I am only for myself, what am I?
  If not now, when? -- Rabbi Hillel, in the _Talmud_...
• I was walking down the street, something caught my eye.
  ..and dragged it fifteen feet. -- Emo Phillip...
• And now I spill myself another drink...