Related:

• A man is as old as the woman he feels. -- Groucho Marx
• A well known scientist (some say it was Bertrand Russell) once gave a public lecture on astronomy.
  He described how the earth orbits around the sun and how the sun, in turn, orbits around the center of a vast collection of stars called our galaxy....
• Marge: Say, I've got a neat idea! Why don't you go in and pick up my mother and we'll all go out to dinner?
  Abe: I'll be back in a jiffy! [comes back with a woman in a wheelchair] Marge...
• I'm sitting in a bar, having a drink. Over here is a man having a drink.
  He falls down three times. I pick him up each time....
• A man is only as old as the woman he feels. -- Groucho Marx
• Well, we're big rock singers, we've got golden fingers, And we're loved everywhere we go.
  We sing about beauty, and we sing about truth, At ten thousand dollars a show....
• Bart: Milhouse...do you ever worry that your mom might stop loving you?
  Milhouse: What? I'm more worried about pirhanas. Did you see that movie where they send a nuclear submarine to fight the pirhanas, and one of them swims right down the periscope and bites the guy in the eye, and he goes, "Aah!...
• That old man eloquent. -- John Milton (1608-1674) -- To the Lady Margaret Ley
• SAGITTARIUS (Nov.22 - Dec.21) Your efforts to help a little old lady cross a street will backfire when you learn that she was waiting for a bus.
  Subdue impulse you have to push her out into traffic....